Okay, I’ll just get right to it. About two years ago I started getting into Lucid Dreaming and lurked around on ld4all and spent a little time on it. I had two LDs as a result within a month of each other but they were very short (10 seconds or shorter) due to excitemtent. I gave up soon after that.
Last week I decided to pick it up again after I found an old bookmark to this particular webpage. I had a short LD about two months ago and decided to look it up again. I’ve spent dozens of hours reading on just about every technique on this site (and forum), scrutinizing the stickies and visiting other web pages about Lucid Dreaming. This is effectively the ninth day that I’m really into it. I know about the most basic techniques, MILD and WBTB, but when I really started reading up on WILD and everything that had something to do with it I became intrigued. People were experiencing things that sounded like they were on drugs and I decided to give it a go, knowing full well that it was a difficult technique, especially for beginners.
However…
The first day I tried WILD (that was Wednesday, last week) I actually had one of the most profound experiences in my life, ever. I started to relax, counting my breathing (after a WBTB) and after a while I switched from focusing on my breathing to focusing on the flashy colors you see when you close your eyes. After some time I started seeing these vivid and colorful images (HI), which kept getting clearer and clearer. I could also hear some strange sounds that I couldn’t identify. Then my whole body started to feel very heavy and my head felt lighter. I got a tingling feeling in my limbs and shortly after that it felt as though my whole body was being electrocuted (though not in a painful manner). I knew that most people got these vibrations, so I wasn’t scared, but extremely surprised as I had never felt such a sensation before.
After the vibrations stopped I felt disconnected from my body, as though I couldn’t move it if I wanted to. The vivid colors and mosaic patters I saw started to diminish and my vision became darker. I saw some sort of darkish tunnel around me (like a cylinder shape) and I was sort of floating in it. Then stars started appearing in that tunnel. I could see it all very clearly and I kept watching passively. I’d read before that this was the moment where my mind was about to enter the dream state, but I messed up here. I got a nagging feeling that I should try to move my body. I rolled over to the left, thinking I’d roll into my dreamworld, but after about five seconds of complete disorientation I noticed that I was actually awake again. I did a RC and that proved it, my first attempt at a WILD had failed.
But I did have one of the most unique (to me anyway) experiences ever and I was so excited that I couldn’t sleep the rest of the night.
Having had three short LD’s before (two ending in awakening after a few seconds and one failing because I lost lucidity and went with the flow of the dream again) and having experienced this WILD attempt, I knew it was possible for me. I had done it, there was no doubt in my mind.
I tried WILD almost every day (except for last Monday and Tuesday because I had to get up earlier than normal for University), but I could never even get to the point where I’d see Hypnagogic Images anymore. Where I “succeeded” on my very first try, without even knowing what to expect, I seemed to no longer be able to even start the process of a WILD. Now, Lucid Dreaming is what I’m aiming for and I do intend on working on MILD and WBTB methods (working on my Dream Recall right now). But WILD was so interesting that even if I can’t manage to get into a LD, at least I’d like to be able to experience it again. The first few days that I tried it again were the worst, since I became a semi insomniac. During the two days where I didn’t attempt to have an LD, I actually had one, though, again, a very short one. It was just a DILD, and after I became lucid it wasn’t the excitement that woke me up, but because I just couldn’t hang on to the dream (should have interacted with my dream environment more).
Anyway, the past three days I’ve tried WILD again (all after a WBTB), but as before I couldn’t even get to the point of getting any HI. The thing I usually do is start off relaxing my body by using the 61 point relaxation method, or slowly controlling my breathing. After getting relaxed I started counting my breaths again, as I did before and sometimes I’d look at the inside of my eyelids instead. Now, I’m the sort of person that takes a long time to fall asleep (half an hour at the very least, even if I’m exhausted), been that way all my life. But I just can’t get my body to fall asleep anymore. I get the feeling that I’m just too aware of things or something. The last two days I spent over an hour a night trying to WILD (single attempts, not several), the last attempt taking almost two hours before I finally gave up. The first time I tried it took roughly 45 minutes before I started getting anywhere. Even if I stop trying to fall asleep consciously (or even on regular nights) I take a long time to fall asleep. I even tried just waiting till I was about to really fall asleep and then start lightly focusing on something, but even if I succeeded (usually I fell asleep) I’d be wide awake again after attempting WILD.
I’m really hoping some of the more experienced practitioners among you can offer me some advice. I have a healthy sleeping pattern, I’m usually decently tired when I get home from university (have to walk a lot too), and I’m pretty good at relaxing my body. I just can’t seem to even get into the WILD anymore. It’s not that I desperately want to succeed with just this particular method, but it’s the one that intrigues me the most and I almost find it more interesting than an LD itself (almost, but not quite ).
Where should I go from here? I’ve done it before, I know it’s possible, it’s just that I can’t seem to repeat my performance. Or was it just beginner’s luck because it was my first attempt?
Thanks in advance.