Wow. Two long double posts. Phobias suck. I know exactly what you mean. All my life I’ve hated cemeteries, corpses (rotting i mean, a guy whos just been killed like in a movie didnt scare me), and that kind of stuff. And so when I started Lucid Dreaming, this would plague me occasionaly when WILDing and such. So, I just confronted it. I went up to this corpse that was doing its best to scare the crap out of me and I had a conversation with him. I asked him his name, he said it was Bob. I asked him what he wanted, he said he wanted to sell me house insurance. Corpses have never bother me since and I no longer fear that kind of stuff, though I will admit that cemeteries still make me uneasy and nervous, its not terrible anymore.
You already know that there is no physical harm if you were to confront a spider, so I suggest you do confront one. Conjure up the biggest, meanest, ugliest spider that you can, give him a human voice, and talk to him. Ask him for a name, what he wants, even ask him why your afraid of spiders. It worked for me and I’ve heard of it working for other people. Give it a shot I say.
And about the energy vampires thing, well, no offence but it seems kinda stupid. Just ignore it.